Who would make the best president? Michael Vick, Lesean McCoy or Desean Jackson?

Posted by Maurice · filed under Politics, Sort Of

It's an election year somewhere, probably, so we convened our crack political desk (three stick figures, drawn in green) to settle the only debate that matters: which Philadelphia Eagle should run the country.

We ran the numbers. We consulted experts. We ignored all of it and went with our gut. The campaign slogans alone would be historic. Imagine the inaugural address. Imagine the parade.

After eleven hours of heated internal debate, our panel reached a unanimous conclusion that none of the three candidates were on the ballot.